Ripshit vs. Makaveli (1-5)

[RipShit]

Rules are at least 10 lines, 3-0 KO, no feedin either.

Heres my verse:

What the fuck be going through your head/
Claimin you be pac when the muthafucka's dead//
Switch your story, claim you be none other than Em/
Mistaken glory all be pumpin through your brain stem//
Havin trouble gamin girls, so he goes onto the internet/
Claimin they be one when he hasnt even seen her yet//
Wakin up in a cold sweat, nightmares of his girl with her real man/
Takin on more passangers then a fuckin minivan//
You be 16, actin like you grown/
Talkin bout totin guns that you don't even own//
Unknown in the street, only known in school/
Only thing you live by is the grammatical rules//
Not killin some niggas, get off this thug shit/
Talk about how your life is one big bottomless pit//
Worthless in other terms, and thats just tellin the truth/
You be bitin more rhymes then you be bitin a Ruth// --candy bar
But I'm sorry Makaveli, I think its "Check Out Time"/
Think about your life, cause son, "Heave Ain't Hard to Find"//

[RipShit]

Links:

http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?p=56157#post56157
http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?t=4414&page=3

[-MaKaVeLi-]

surrounded by troops, u decrease peice by piece
evaporting into dust, ur more less than the least
u dont amount to anything, ur like excess bagage
fucked ya mom in the ass so hard, left her asshole ravaged
got a bully at school so u tell ur dad ur sick
he says 'bull shit u lil fucker, dont make me smack u wit my dick
the bully leaves u with a bloody nose and a bunch of broken teeth
you go home cryin, yellin "MOMMY MOMMY I GOT BEAT"
ya live life as a mess and misery, u got an unhealable sickness
killed u on spot with no witnesses cuz of my quickness
ur a pussy cuz ur remember my wrath is these coming days
u got ur tail between ur legs and u hope and u pray


* Line 1 means hes defeated so he himself is decreasing'
* Line 2 means hes nothing , hes more than than even the least of things



VOTES!

[-MaKaVeLi-]

My Links:


http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?t=3318&page=3&pp=10
http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?t=4414



VOTES!

[Deagle50]

Consistency/Structure: mak
Creativity: rip
Enjoyable: mak
Flow: mak
Metaphors: rip
Multies: mak
Personal: rip
Punches:mak
Vocabulary: rip
Wordplay: mak
Overall:mak

-vote- makaveli

[RipShit]

Yo, if its cool with you Mak, I'd rather not allow either of Almite's votes (yes, he did vote twice, he's the same person). I have beef with him, unfair that he votes and really puts this battle in a huge disadvantage for me. But yo, if you want to take this battle I don't really care, I'd just like some criticism, and not some dickridin votes cause I cooked the fuckin worm on the beef board. Up to you though man.

[madchild]

Almites' votes do not count in this battle, he voted twice and not even delegating the winner of the category the same on both votes. He obviously doesn't know how to vote, or what the categories mean in a battle.

Almite, if you're going to vote, you MUST vote on a bar-by-bar breakdown of the verses or your votes don't count. Stop wasting my time Almite, take this as a warning. Also, don't freepost in other peoples battles.

Open for Votes

1-0 Mak

[child prodigy]

Don't misunderstand, i fully understand the catagories but my bordem has the best of me so, i'll break things down bar-by-bar.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
RipShit

What the be going through your head/
Claimin you be pac when the muthaa's dead//
pretty good. exposing the falsehood in his name
Switch your story, claim you be none other than Em/
Mistaken glory all be pumpin through your brain stem//
nice follow up.
Havin trouble gamin girls, so he goes onto the internet/
Claimin they be one when he hasnt even seen her yet//
Wakin up in a cold sweat, nightmares of his girl with her real man/
Takin on more passangers then a in minivan//
pretty funny, but had the sense of being a filler
You be 16, actin like you grown/
Talkin bout totin guns that you don't even own//
now that was good. personal and packed a "punch"
Unknown in the street, only known in school/
Only thing you live by is the grammatical rules//
Starts off fine but it seemed you couldn't find a match for the 1st line. but i understood the point. Not too bad, contextually but not too good based on content.
Not killin some gas, get off this thug shit/
Talk about how your life is one big bottomless pit//
It's a filler. right?
Worthless in other terms, and thats just tellin the truth/
You be bitin more rhymes then you be bitin a Ruth// --candy bar
Okay line. (shouldn't have to explain it though)
But I'm sorry Makaveli, I think its "Check Out Time"/
Think about your life, cause son, "Heave Ain't Hard to Find"//
i didn't really get this because of the last line. "heave"?

Makaveli

surrounded by troops, u decrease peice by piece
evaporting into dust, ur more less than the least
your use of multies is good but punch wasn't as effective
u dont amount to anything, ur like excess bagage
fucked ya mom in the ass so hard, left her asshole ravaged
funny, nice line, but the whole 'sex with your mom/sister thing is old and weak.'
got a bully at school so u tell ur dad ur sick
he says 'bull shit u lil er, dont make me smack u wit my dick
It runs off a bit in the 2nd line.
the bully leaves u with a bloody nose and a bunch of broken teeth
you go home cryin, yellin "MOMMY MOMMY I GOT BEAT"
what would've been funnier is if YOU were the bully...not much of a punch
ya live life as a mess and misery, u got an unhealable sickness
killed u on spot with no witnesses cuz of my quickness
again, i liked the use of multies, punch was not the greatest though.
ur a pussy cuz ur remember my wrath is these coming days
u got ur tail between ur legs and u hope and u pray
it's okay. not that great of a closer.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Consistency/Structure: off (both of you) but Makaveli's seemed more structurized
Creativity: RipShit
Enjoyable: (close but giving it to) RipShit
Flow: Makaveli's structure aids him in the flow
Metaphors: Pretty brutal from both parties but giving it to RipShit
Multies: Makaveli
Personal: RipShit (got me with that 16 year of-toting guns line)
Punches:evdience is visible but not that visible. Goes to RipShit
Vocabulary: Makaveli (a little more enchanced than RipShit but didn't raise the bar)
Wordplay: Makaveli

Overall: Tie (even though RipShit went over the limit)

I expected alot better coming from both of you. especially you Makaveli.

[RipShit]

Just quick follow-up, there was no limit to lines - I said at least 10 lines. Also, must of been a typo, because that last bar was heaven aint hard to find, referring to tupac, tied it in with him being pac an all.

Who gets the vote in a tie? Do we each get one? if so, I believe its 1-2, mak is up

[-MaKaVeLi-]

ya rip shit..its fine with me mang..no wurries...so who got prdigys vote?

[RipShit]

no idea, do you want to just count it as a point for both of us or not count it as any points at all?

[-MaKaVeLi-]

just do both so we both get a vote..its even that way i guess.anything works for me

[RipShit]

Yeah, thats fine.

2-1 Mak

[-MaKaVeLi-]

more votes please...

[child prodigy]

i misread that. sorry RipShit...but my vote doesn't change, it's still a tie.

With the "heaven ain't hard to find" line in consideration...
i know exactly what you mean. that one letter made quite the difference.

by the way, SORRY FOR FREEPOSTING! NEVER AGAIN!

[Eluzion]

Consistency/Structure: Mak
Creativity: Rip
Enjoyable: Mak
Flow: Mak
Metaphors: Rip
Multies: Mak
Personal: Mak
Punches:Mak
Vocabulary: Rip
Wordplay: Mak
Overall: Mak

Vote: -MaKaVeLi-

[-MaKaVeLi-]

is tath 3-1?

if so..

more votes please

[open_mic]

Votes gos to Makaveli Just For More Punches and less fillers, good job u2

[-MaKaVeLi-]

yo man there not gonna count it...you need to use the categoires but thanks

[madchild]

Votes gos to Makaveli Just For More Punches and less fillers, good job u2

Vote not valid, thereby doesn't count. Rules are rules.

[Killa Jones]

Consistency/Structure: mak
Creativity: rip
Enjoyable: mak
Flow: mak
Metaphors: rip
Multies: mak
Personal: mak
Punches:mak
Vocabulary: rip
Wordplay: mak
Overall:mak

-vote- makaveli

[-MaKaVeLi-]

thanks klilla
4-1
anymore votes!

[-MaKaVeLi-]

VOTES c'MON!!

[-MaKaVeLi-]

alright we need a couple of more votes C'mon! any1one!!

[TfLaMeZ]

What the be going through your head/
Claimin you be pac when the muthaa's dead//
This is alright, but i think that typea diss to him is a bit played out
Switch your story, claim you be none other than Em/
Mistaken glory all be pumpin through your brain stem//
pretty good, you had a nice idea
Havin trouble gamin girls, so he goes onto the internet/
Claimin they be one when he hasnt even seen her yet//
could consider that filler, but if its a diss its weak
Wakin up in a cold sweat, htmares of his girl with her real man/
Takin on more passangers then a in minivan//
uh..what the hell was that?
You be 16, actin like you grown/
Talkin bout totin guns that you don't even own//
good line, coulda been stronger
Unknown in the street, only known in school/
Only thing you live by is the grammatical rules//
pretty good diss, i like it
Not killin some gas, get off this thug shit/
Talk about how your life is one big bottomless pit//
bad flow, and its also kinda filler
Worthless in other terms, and thats just tellin the truth/
You be bitin more rhymes then you be bitin a Ruth// --candy bar
pretty good, metaphor, and dis, but i dont think its true
But I'm sorry Makaveli, I think its "Check Out Time"/
Think about your life, cause son, "Heave Ain't Hard to Find"//
that was creative, i'd say your best line was that

mak's verse
surrounded by troops, u decrease peice by piece
evaporting into dust, ur more less than the least
that was nice, good flow, rhyme and diss
u dont amount to anything, ur like excess bagage
ed ya mom in the ass so hard, left her asshole ravaged
haha!! that was good i liked it
got a bully at school so u tell ur dad ur sick
he says 'bull shit u lil er, dont make me smack u wit my dick
that was alright, could have made it stronger though
the bully leaves u with a bloody nose and a bunch of broken teeth
you go home cryin, yellin "MOMMY MOMMY I GOT BEAT"
that was good, hopefully i got the message you intended
ya live life as a mess and misery, u got an unhealable sickness
killed u on spot with no witnesses cuz of my quickness
good, but its filler
ur a pussy cuz ur remember my wrath is these coming days
u got ur tail between ur legs and u hope and u pray
that was a good closer, could have made that stronger too though.

all in all, i'd say Mak took this, he was better all around, ripshit, you could have been a lot stronger then you were here

OVERALL: Makaveli

[madchild]

CLOSED Makaveli wins 5-1.