Best Of Em.Net Tourny: Joe M vs. ZenLand

[ZenLand]

A Minimum of 6 Bars. If You want more than you can agree on more than 6.

Deadline is Friday.

Only votes that will be counted HAVE to be bar-by-bar breakdown or cats. Don't just say who won

[ZenLand]

Hell's In Store For This Weak Stoner, I'm Tellin This Whore He's Gonna Be Beat Over
Joe's Pushin His Luck Like He's Sellin Four Leaf Clovers On Street Corners

Beat You The First Time And I'll Do The Same Thing In Two, You Can't Maintain You Lose
I'm Gonna Euthenize Joe M Because It's The Humane Thing To Do (http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?p=400266#post400266)

Play It Back Again But I Still Got More Points Than You Like Rerun Games On Tivo
Hes Lame And He Knows The Only Way This Kid Got More Then Zen/Mortensen Is If Your First Name Was Viggo

Ain't Noone Addicted To His Rappin, Hes Still Spittin Amidst Their Laughin
Joe's Rhymes Put Children To Sleep So He Could Be Convicted Of Kidnapping

I'm Gonna Slay With My Vet Skill, He Had High Expectations But He Stayed And Met Lil
How You Gonna Stay In This Tourny When You Can't Even Pay Your Net Bill

His Punches Don't Seem To Hit Me, I Mean Bitch Do You Really Mean To Offend Me?
He Knows I Won, Now I Know Why Its Called The Emerald Isle, Because You Green With Envy

Quick Six. I Got Serious Writer's Block:mad:

[Joe M]

fuck our last battle, that was only me 'doing a warm up'/
ever since you dissed me it's been like 'brewing a storm up'/

you beat me before, believe me it won't 'happen again'/
this isn't a battle, only me 'stabbin Zen'/

says in ya bio "been rapping for a while, just starting back"/
judging by what you just wrote, that should be 'just starting wack'/
you came here all confident and cocky, but now your 'bust n darting back'/

he's afraid i'll find where he lives, all he says is 'still in the south'/
fuck doing this in the battle thread, I could 'kill in the call out'/

I believe all your threats as much as I believe you weren't bitin (http://forum.eminem.net/showthread.php?t=26309)/
I make you leave this site with embarrasment, and completely give up writing/

First I'll just toy, degragate and elude you/
then completely destroy, decimate and delude you/


uppin votes

[free92]

man both great but zen takes this

[ZenLand]

You Need To Break It Down

[I.R.EMCEE]

Zen:
Hell's In Store For This Weak Stoner, I'm Tellin This Whore He's Gonna Be Beat Over
Joe's Pushin His Luck Like He's Sellin Four Leaf Clovers On Street Corners
Lol, I like the opener, the whole Clover Dealing thing got me laughin'.
Beat You The First Time And I'll Do The Same Thing In Two, You Can't Maintain You Lose
I'm Gonna Euthenize Joe M Because It's The Humane Thing To Do
Nice personal, ok bar otherwise.
Play It Back Again But I Still Got More Points Than You Like Rerun Games On Tivo
Hes Lame And He Knows The Only Way This Kid Got More Then Zen/Mortensen Is If Your First Name Was Viggo
Good wordplay here. Nice bar.
Ain't Noone Addicted To His Rappin, Hes Still Spittin Amidst Their Laughin
Joe's Rhymes Put Children To Sleep So He Could Be Convicted Of Kidnapping
Liked this bar alot. It was good, 'kidnapping' lol.
I'm Gonna Slay With My Vet Skill, He Had High Expectations But He Stayed And Met Lil
How You Gonna Stay In This Tourny When You Can't Even Pay Your Net Bill
Ok bar.
His Punches Don't Seem To Hit Me, I Mean Bitch Do You Really Mean To Offend Me?
He Knows I Won, Now I Know Why Its Called The Emerald Isle, Because You Green With Envy
Decent punch/personal. Was a alright finisher.COLOR]
Joe:
fuck our last battle, that was only me 'doing a warm up'/
ever since you dissed me it's been like 'brewing a storm up'/
[COLOR="red"]I like how you used your last battle against zen and used it to your advantage.
you beat me before, believe me it won't 'happen again'/
this isn't a battle, only me 'stabbin Zen'/
Hm. Wasn't feelin' it.
says in ya bio "been rapping for a while, just starting back"/
judging by what you just wrote, that should be 'just starting wack'/
you came here all confident and cocky, but now your 'bust n darting back'/
Hmm it was a decent bar, and you had a personal in there.
he's afraid i'll find where he lives, all he says is 'still in the south'/
fuck doing this in the battle thread, I could 'kill in the call out'/
The multi was off by a few man. Kinda weak.
I believe all your threats as much as I believe you weren't bitin/
I make you leave this site with embarrasment, and completely give up writing/
I think this was your best overall bar. Personal Included.
First I'll just toy, degragate and elude you/
then completely destroy, decimate and delude you/
Not a good finisher, this would've been better building up into your best bar.

Joe, gettin' better I have to say. Keep tryin' though.
Vote = Zen.

[ZenLand]

1-0 Uppin This

[YoBoyCue]

Consistency/Structure:well both writer's consistency seemed a tad off as far asbar length
Creativity: ZenLand was more creative, however a bit hard of reading
Enjoyable:ZenLand again hard to enjoy when u must reread some things
Flow: Flow was honestly off on both, the more consistent and more fluent was Joe however
Metaphors: Zenland...easy
Multies: Zenlands read better
Personal: Zenland
Punches: Zenland
Vocabulary: Zenland
Wordplay: Zenland
Overall:Zenland

[ZenLand]

2-0 Uppin K.O.

[chappy]

ZEN:

Hell's In Store For This Weak Stoner, I'm Tellin This Whore He's Gonna Be Beat Over
Joe's Pushin His Luck Like He's Sellin Four Leaf Clovers On Street Corners

^^Sick Meta on the 2nd line, coulda done better on the first line, but this is your best bar... nice.

Beat You The First Time And I'll Do The Same Thing In Two, You Can't Maintain You Lose
I'm Gonna Euthenize Joe M Because It's The Humane Thing To Do

^^Aiight, liking this line another nice meta.

Play It Back Again But I Still Got More Points Than You Like Rerun Games On Tivo
Hes Lame And He Knows The Only Way This Kid Got More Then Zen/Mortensen Is If Your First Name Was Viggo

^^Not feeling this bar at all mate...

Ain't Noone Addicted To His Rappin, Hes Still Spittin Amidst Their Laughin
Joe's Rhymes Put Children To Sleep So He Could Be Convicted Of Kidnapping

^^Decent punch

I'm Gonna Slay With My Vet Skill, He Had High Expectations But He Stayed And Met Lil
How You Gonna Stay In This Tourny When You Can't Even Pay Your Net Bill

^^Mehh... average.

His Punches Don't Seem To Hit Me, I Mean Bitch Do You Really Mean To Offend Me?
He Knows I Won, Now I Know Why Its Called The Emerald Isle, Because You Green With Envy

^^Ended with a decent meta.



JOE:

fuck our last battle, that was only me 'doing a warm up'/
ever since you dissed me it's been like 'brewing a storm up'/

^^Nice multi but there's no punch/diss present in this bar... filler.

you beat me before, believe me it won't 'happen again'/
this isn't a battle, only me 'stabbin Zen'/

^^Not a multi.. and a weak bar

says in ya bio "been rapping for a while, just starting back"/
judging by what you just wrote, that should be 'just starting wack'/
you came here all confident and cocky, but now your 'bust n darting back'/

^^Better, hitter a lil harder here, still weak tho..

he's afraid i'll find where he lives, all he says is 'still in the south'/
fuck doing this in the battle thread, I could 'kill in the call out'/

^^Ehh weak again, but at least you hittin' harder.

I believe all your threats as much as I believe you weren't bitin/
I make you leave this site with embarrasment, and completely give up writing/

^^Again weak...

First I'll just toy, degragate and elude you/
then completely destroy, decimate and delude you/

^^Soft ender...


Zenland takes this. I can see you've both improved especially Zen he had some decent metas in there... Joe you gettin' slightly better with ya rhyming but rhyming ain't the only thing that matters in a battle, you need to add punches, metas, personals and wordplay, some of which Zen had present in his drop which made it a stronger verse and won him the battle.

Overall decent battle for you guys, keep doin' ya thing.

VOTE: ZenLand.

[ZenLand]

3-0 K.O I Advance